Set yourself up for a beautiful marriage.
Hi! Are you recently engaged? Congratulations! And also condolences! Because engagement is hard effing work, friend!
You might be REALLY excited.
You might also be feeling a lot of expectation, pressure, anxiety and overwhelm, too.
I’m willing to bet (like – I would bet a lot of money) that there’s a ton of stuff swirling around (and between!) you and your partner right now.
And that’s totally normal.
The months between engagement and marriage can be fun. Pretty often, though, that fun is tangled up with the stress of wedding planning, family expectations, role changes, and – oh yeah – the enormity of deciding to spend your whole entire life with another human!
It’s beyond easy to get swept up into the chaos.
But at the end of the day, what you’re actually doing is embarking on an exciting journey with your favorite person. And it’s absolutely, totally, 100% worth dedicating time and energy to the preparation.
Good marriages don’t happen by accident.
In fact, they take a whole lot of work. That’s where I come in. 👋
I’m Melinda, and I can’t WAIT to help you jump into marriage with both feet.
Really. It’ll be so much fun.
What is premarital therapy?
Premarital therapy is exactly what it sounds like – therapy focused on helping you and your partner lay the groundwork for your future marriage, before you get married.
Taking time amidst the chaos and excitement of wedding planning to focus on your growing relationship with your partner is one of the best ways to build a solid foundation AND stay present for this moment in time. (And maybe enjoy it a little, too!)
The heart of our premarital therapy sessions will center things like:
• Your family histories
• The beliefs and biases you both knowingly and unknowingly bring into the relationship
• The hopes and expectations you have for your future together
• Your thoughts and feelings about expanding your family
• How you approach conflict and decision-making
...and the other things that make your relationship so uniquely yours.
What questions do you ask in premarital therapy?
When you invest in premarital therapy, you should be getting more than just a worksheet! So I’m a big fan of using the best tools out there – and then taking time to debrief and process them with you and your partner.
I use a combination of the Prepare/Enrich program and emotionally focused therapy (EFT) to help couples uncover and explore the strengths they already have, as well as opportunities for growth. The Enneagram is another tool I love to help couples better understand the individual needs and patterns that show up for each of us.
We’ll work to get a handle on your strengths, your rougher edges, and any potential “chafing points” for you and your partner.
We’ll dig into things like your family history, the belief systems you bring to the relationship, how you navigate conflict, and other Big Things that have the potential to become obstacles to a happy marriage.
It’s important to me that you and your partner feel seen – and we’ll work to get you to see each other, too.
How many sessions are required for premarital therapy?
We’ll work together to develop the right trajectory for you and your partner. Typically, premarital therapy consists of 8-10 weekly sessions of 75 minutes each.
Premarital therapy sessions happen in my office in San Jose, California or via telehealth for California clients.
Ready to begin?